The best Christmas song....

This is the world's best Christmas song... It goes out to literally EVERYONE in my life.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wjEIP6otc4Y

It was christmas eve babe
In the drunk tank
An old man said to me: won't see another one
And then they sang a song
The rare old mountain dew
I turned my face away and dreamed about you
Got on a lucky one
Came in eighteen to one
I´ve got a feeling
This year´s for me and you
So happy christmas
I love you baby
I can see a better time
Where all our dreams come true.

They got cars big as bars
They got rivers of gold
But the wind goes right through you
It´s no place for the old
When you first took my hand on a cold christmas eve
You promised me broadway was waiting for me
You were handsome you were pretty
Queen of new york city when the band finished playing they yelled out for more
Sinatra was swinging all the drunks they were singing
We kissed on a corner
Then danced through the night.

And the boys from the NYPD choir were singing Galway Bay
And the bells were ringing out for christmas day.

You´re a bum you´re a punk
You´re an old slut on junk
Lying there almost dead on a drip in that bed
You scumbag you maggot
You cheap lousy faggot
Happy christmas your arse I pray god it´s our last.

And the boys of the NYPD choir's still singing Galway Bay
And the bells were ringing out
For christmas day.

I could have been someone
Well so could anyone
You took my dreams from me
When I first found you
I kept them with me babe
I put them with my own
Can´t make it out alone
I´ve built my dreams around you

And the boys of the NYPD choir's still singing Galway Bay
And the bells are ringing out
For christmas day.

I misssss yooouuuuu.

I felt you in my legs before I ever met you and when I lay beside you for the first time I told you, "I feel you in my heart and I don't even know you." And now we're saying bye, bye, bye... And now we're saying bye, bye, bye... I was nineteen. Call me... I felt you in my life before I ever thought to,I feel the need to lay it down beside you and tell you, "I feel you in my heart and I don't even know you." And now we're saying bye, bye, bye... Now we're saying bye, bye, bye... I was nineteen... Call me. I was nineteen. Call me. Flew home back to where we met, stayed inside, I was so upset... I cooked up a plan so good except I was all alone, you were all I had... Love you... You were all mine... Love me, I was yours right... I was yours, right? I was nineteen... Call me... (Bye) (Bye)... I was nineteen... Call me... (Bye) (Bye).

Big Red Nor

I'm so tired of getting my hopes up and then having them dashed to pieces. Especially about these boys I think are really there for me. Fuck you. :) Love you.

For real. I was falling for you, and I thought you felt something too, but it turns out you were just another waste of time, another one of those dozens of dimes.

I am the Battlestar Galactica.

"What do you hear?"
"Nothing but the rain."
"So grab your gun and bring in the cat."

Rellaw.

It's stupid... but little things like "I hope you and ... have fun [at our twelve hour Lord of the Rings marathon]" when He commented on my Facebook status still sends darts of actual pain through me. I'm happy with ... but... He is... Him.

Edit:

"What about everyone else involved? Have fun on your date!" That shut him up. :)

Edit # 2:

Just kidding. He is now asking if he can come. Why do I suck?

Edit # 3:

Fuck me... THIS SUCKS! Not that I don't want Him to come... But... really?

Edit # 4:

"I'll see what I can do." - Him.
"Goodie." - Me.

Hot shit.

Edit # 5:

OH! THE NERVE! Now he is setting conditions!!! I'll keep... uhm... YOU? updated. And no more edits... Oh! He wants me to make him a bed out of blankies on the floor. Sweet boy.

Edit # 6:

I will not! under any circumstances ask him about his date... i.e. "what about your date?"

Edit # 7:

Just kidding.

Edit # 8:

32 comments on my status later and I'm left feeling the same.

The Resolution.

There's a lot that I don't know, there's a lot that I'm still learning but I think I'm letting go to find my body... It's still burning. You hold me down! And you got me living in the past, come on and pick me up, somebody clear the wreckage from the blast. I'm alive! And I don't need a witness to know that I survived, I'm not looking for forgiveness. I just need light, I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution. The bars are finally closed, so I try living in the moment 'til the moment, it just froze and I felt sick and so alone. I can hear the sound of your voice still ringing in my ear, I'm going underground but you'll find me anywhere, I fear. Resolution, resolution... Tomorrow back from now, Mona, I'm almost home.


I'm alive! And I don't need a witness to know that I survived, I'm not looking for forgiveness. I just need light, I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution.

Christmas with the Kranks.

I guess I'm kinda dating. Which is okay... God. I just can't help but still wish it was Him. What is the matter with me? I guess what I like about... let's call him Draft (due to his block 2 class), what I like about Draft as that things are simple... and non complicated, which is exactly what I need... I think I'm going to go call some Victoria Beachers... I need some serious VB time with the Tease and the Slut.

Love,
L.

Letter

You.

I have compiled here a list of songs. Basically what I did was put my iPod on Shuffle and selected everything that came up. Last night I had this crazy dream about you. We were standing outside of JJ's coffee house and this Middle Eastern man walked up to us with this crazy massive riffle that was made out of spaghetti and Tupperware, so you pulled me against you and whispered for me to close my eyes and I said, "no! Why?" And pulled away and looked over my shoulder and this guy aimed the riffle at the sky and pulled the trigger... Suddenly the whole world was on fire. We watched Seattle burn... it had been bombed. After that my dreams turned into a News-like format, showing me images of all this destruction in bombed Seattle, and your voice was echoing "close your eyes, close your eyes, close your eyes..." over and over again...


There's a lot that I don't know, there's a lot that I'm still learning, but I think I'm letting go to find my body is still burning. And you hold me down and you got me living in the past, Come on and pick me up, somebody clear the wreckage from the blast. I'm alive and I don't need a witness to know that I survived, I'm not looking for forgiveness, I just need light, I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution. I'm alive and I don't need a witness to know that I survived, I'm not looking for forgiveness, I just need light, I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution. You hold me down, you hold me down... I'm alive and I don't need a witness to know that I survived, I'm not looking for forgiveness, I'm alive and I don't need a witness to know that I survived, I'm not looking for forgiveness, I just need light, I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution. I need light, I need light.

That is "The Resolution" by Jack's Mannequin, which was the song that originally started off this ULTIMATE PLAYLIST, but now it's just in alphabetical order...

"Here is the thing about this playlist... you shouldn't OVER ANALYZE some of the songs... But don't UNDER ANALYZE most of them..." Your playlist still feels more epic than mine, but some of my songs are more epic than all of your put together =) That and I'm used to yours...

Kay. Bye.

P.S. Is this the game I'm supposed to play every time?

Huh

Eleanor:

Here I have compiled a list of a few select favourites, keeping it as slow as possible. These are songs that I find, I don't know, heartwarming? Most of them anyways, others are favourites I thought I needed to include. These have no hidden meaning, just a few artists I thought you might like, and the songs I really like.
Enjoy : D

So, after 40 minutes of scouring my itunes library, my grandmother has waken up on her own accord, and I have run out of space your drive. Now I have to delete some, to make room for the little I have left.

10 minutes later, I'm sure thats it, all I can fit anyways. You have no more room on here. And I doubled all your songs.
I guess I'll go through and see whats not needed. Um, 2 songs.

Have a picture to go with the folder. Actually take my whole wallpaper folder.


Okay, so, a mix of music, mostly peaceful hopefully.
kkbye.

Le Petit Prince

Adieu. Et tâche d'être heureux. J'ai perdu du temps, on est tellement bête a vouloir cacher tous nos sentiments. Voilà que tu pars, je te demande pardon... J'aurais dû te dire depuis si longtemps que je t'aimais tant... Va. Maintenant va t'en, j'apprendrai sans toi a aimer le vent, l'air frais de la nuit. J'apprendrai sans toi avec les chenilles et les papillons a tromper l'ennui. Ne traîne pas, adieu, et tâche d'être heureu...

Edelweiss... Edelweiss.... Edelweiss....

I'm in love with you.

I know in my heart...

• No matter how many times I keep running away, I'll still be waiting for Him.
• No matter how many guys I keep fooling myself about, at the end of the day, I'll go to sleep thinking about him.
• If I keep drowning myself in pointless hook up's, I'll never be happy, I'll just learn how to settle.
• I need to attract the things I want for myself to me.

• It's okay for me to be with other guys while I try to figure out what exactly I want from Him... But I also have to know my limit and play within it.

(Brief introduction: Glinda... My longest friend. That is all you need to know. That and she is Asian.)

• If I keep going down this path... I'll be okay with settling...
  

Happyyy day!

To Him?

When I was younger, I saw my daddy cry and curse at the wind. He broke his own heart and I watched as he tried to reassemble it... My momma swore that she would never let herself forget and that was the day that I promised I'd never sing of love if it does not exist. But darling, you, are, the only exception... You, are, the only exception... You, are, the only exception... You, are, the only exception. Maybe I know, somewhere, deep in my soul that love never lasts. And we've got to find other ways to make it alone, to keep a straight face. And I've always lived like this, keeping a comfortable, distance and up until now I had sworn to myself that I'm content with loneliness. Because none of it was ever worth the risk. I've got a tight grip on reality but I can't let go of what's in front of me here... I know you're leaving in the morning, when you wake up, leave me with some kind of proof it's not a dream... And I'm on my way to believing.


To my trouble?

Oh shit. Really? Couldn't this have happened like... 12 years ago? When I was... you know, in Kindergarten? We would have been such a hot couple back then...

"I think your gorgeous. I love your hair...very sexy. You're smart. Not over done like some girls, very down to earth. Beautiful eyes too." I'M IN BIG TROUBLE!!!!

I have found the.... "inspiration" I've been looking for.... the inspiration that gets my blood boiling.... Like the full of EVERYTHING, cute, kind, splendid guy... that gets me HOT?!? Whoa... I just KNOW America and Mona are reading this going "oh No...."


What's the catch?

Oh right. I'm totally head over heels with HIM.... Not Gets-Me-Hot boy... Oh crap.

Hour of the Bull.

Uh oh. I'm in trouble.

Monaaaa

Mona Campbell. Where are you? I thought we had something special? A regular Elphaba and G(a)linda. I need you back here, taking care of me under your large feathery wing. Where are you?

Fake Empire brought to you in part by... The National.

I actually feel lonely tonight, which makes me sad, because it helps me realize that I still have a long way to go in feeling happy by myself. Maybe, in some way, I could blame it upon my music. HIS music. The music that I keep listening to, trying to find some... some small sense of clarity. So here I am, typing a way, searching for the sign in the music, the key in the words. I feel like he is trying to talk to me in the music he put on the C.D. Like some songs are meant to tell me that HE KNOWS I love him... Others telling me to get over it, many telling me to keep waiting, because eventually he'll come around. Lot's of them speak about his brother, and I actually feel the pain. I kinda get it. Many of the songs leave me completely perplexed, anxiety ridden and alive.

I feel like I can start living again now... Like I might be able to find my place in... In me. I don't care to find my place in the world, its not in my power to find it.


I can truly say I'm happy with the slight chance of Down for a while...

Over half way through and I'm still looking for the song that will give me the real answer to the question I want answered. Here's the thing though, for now, I'm happy not knowing. I still told Him that I loved Him though, even though it was across a stage... and it was under my breath.

L.

This about says it.

"Because me, myself and I, are all in love with you."

The modern day mixtape; a memory stick (also known as a portable hard drive).
It's such a curious little object. Does the same meaning go into making a playlist and then putting it on one of those as it did making a cassette or C.D.? Here is my view on the matter; whoever takes the time to sit about putting 219 songs onto a memory stick has GOT to be doing SOMETHING boring with his life... or something with his emotions... Even if he doesn't realize it yet?

Okay, okay. I guess HE needs to be dubbed something, since everyone else has been. Let's see... Obviously, if HE or anyone I had told (Phae and... well, I WILL tell Mona, but she is off being talented) read this, they would be like, "oh yeah, that's for sure...." BUT, no one else will, they'll be like, "who is her new victim...?" This is hard work... Let's just call him... let's call him

I don't for the life of me remember what I was going to write... I got distracted by a series of things on the computer... oh well.

Seriously, how could music that was chosen specifically for me NOT have some cryptic meaning to it? Okay, fine... It doesn't necessarily HAVE to... That doesn't mean I am NOT wanting it to.

Song number eight and I know he is in love with me. Which makes me giffy , which is exciting...
Giffy is definitely supposed to read 'giddy', but that's okay, its my new thing...

Anyway, I'm totally into this new Fumanchu thing, so its cool.
This is my new nighttime mantra...

Conscious awareness will emerge in my dreams.

AUREVOIR.

I run a speak easy...

I don't know about you boys, but, if you're like me than hanging around this old man hole is bringing you down six feet under, getting underneath your skin. Cabin fever's setting in, and you're stir crazy, stuck in a rut, you could use a little pick-me-up. I can give you what it is you crave, a little something from the good old days. Hey, I got the wind right here in a jar, I've got the rain on tab at the bar, I've got the sunshine up on a shelf, allow me to introduce myself;

Hey, brother, what's my name? My name is Our Lady of the Underground. Brother, what's my name? Our Lady of Ways, Our Lady of Mean. Hey, brother, what's my name? Our Lady of the Upside Down. Want to know my name? I'll tell you my name; Persephone.

Come here, brother, let me guess; it's the little things you miss. Spring flowers, autumn leaves, ask me brother and you shall receive or maybe these just aren't enough, maybe you're looking for some stronger stuff? I've got a sight for the sorest eyes. When's the last time you saw the sky?

Wipe away your tears, brother. Brother, I know how you feel. I can you blinded by the sadness of it all. Look a little closer and everything will be revealed. Look a little closer, there's a crack in the wall. You want stars? I've got a sky full, put a coin in the slot, you'll get an eyeful, you want the moon? Yeah, I got her too. She's right here waiting in my pay-per-view... How long's it been? A little moon shine isn't a sin. One at a time, boys, straight bodied...

What the boss don't know, the boss don't mind. :)

Ribonuclease Eclipsed

Been here before, though there's something in the air this time. Now I want to give away what I've taken back, run away with you toward the night. A thousand names, though this something in me cannot smile. I don't want to spend the day retracing steps, run away with you toward the light. I can't stay long in the morning, another world went wrong - it's ok. Now that you're gone, hold me in your eyes or suddenly deny... I sympathize. Those diamond days, a thousand strands of sunlight in his eyes. Now I want to give away what I've taken back. Step away with you toward the night. Hold me in your eyes or suddenly deny, I empathize. Hurry up and sleep, to the night you go.

Last night, I was so ready to fall in love again, today the though just makes me feel sick. I'm too ready to jump into it all over again... But I've never fallen in love before. Last time, I just WAS and it was so incredible and I loved it... But I really need time for me, and every time anyone comes around, its like I think I'm really into it- but I know I'm not...

In which confessions are spilled.

I feel like Mona, Phae, Ruddy and America really took me under their large, conjoined wing this week. I feel raging optimism because people are really taking chances on me and are pursuing their friendships for me. I feel... happy.

Mona Campbell- A protagonist's introduction... and several supporting actors...

Mona is five feet short, dark eyed, dark haired, comically tragic and dismal. She has demons and is prone to placing people on pedestals. I just read this to her and she said, "hey! You're not supposed to tell people that..." And now I'm reading it out loud to her and she said, "you're not supposed to do that!" And we are in a three way call with Sandy, who doesn't get an alias because I won't be talking about him very much, and he said, "YOU'RE BLOGGING?!" And Mona said, "SANDY!" And Sandy said, "I WANT TO BE CALLED RUBBER DUCK." And so he shall.

Rubber Duck wants me to, "please stop this commentary." And Mona wants me to write more about her...

Back to Mona.
After 10 PM, she tends to go mildly mad. I think that it is the result of the darkness outside, and sometimes inside the house and also her body's undeniable tiredness and it releases this little demon. One day, I went to sleep at her house and it was before I actually realized how honestly mentally unsound she was and she BIT me. Like... her teeth on my hand. It was nice. And she picked a fight with our friend, who shall be called Ape, because Ape is taking Rubber Duck to prom... which didn't sit well.

ANYWAY. Mona... Mona is probably one of the most beautifully confounding people I've ever encountered. She is this little ray of light that tosses me into complete happiness; yet she has this surging darkness that threatens to envelope her at any instant. She makes me so desperately sad... But on the same hand, she is simply spell binding and makes me explode in happiness... and overall confusing character.